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Connecting communication - How to apply it?
You have probably experienced that communication with a colleague, friend or family member does not go as smoothly as you would like. Perhaps misunderstandings arise, feelings are misunderstood, or it seems like you are not really listening to each other. Situations like these can present extra challenges for entrepreneurs and executives, especially when business interests are at stake. Connecting communication can make a world of difference here. It is a way of communicating that not only helps to get your message across clearly, but also to really connect and avoid misunderstandings.
What is connecting communication?
Connecting communication, sometimes called non-violent communication, is a method developed by Marshall Rosenberg. It is about communicating with empathy and respect, both for your own needs and those of the other person. Instead of reacting from frustration or impatience, connecting communication helps you listen and speak with an open mind. This creates space to look for solutions together and to understand the underlying reasons for behaviour. For entrepreneurs and managers, this method can help create a positive corporate culture and effectively address conflicts within teams.
What are the benefits of connecting communication?
Connective communication has many benefits, both personally and professionally. First, it helps resolve conflicts faster and in a constructive way. Within a business environment, where people want to communicate results quickly, this technique can create calm and clarity, allowing decisions to be made in a well-considered way. Instead of focusing on who is right, you focus on what moves the other person, which ensures mutual understanding and respect. Moreover, connecting communication helps build strong and authentic relationships. As you gain more insight into your own feelings and needs, you can share them in a respectful way. This creates an atmosphere of trust, in which the other person also feels free to be open and honest. Connective communication allows you to communicate more effectively, leading to better cooperation and fewer misunderstandings. This skill is not only useful in difficult conversations but also contributes to your personal growth and well-being. For a manager, it means that team members feel safe to give honest feedback, which promotes productivity and well-being in the workplace.
Applying connecting communication in 5 steps
Want to communicate connectively? Then follow these five steps:
Start by naming what you have observed, without interpretations. Describe objectively what you see or hear, without judgements. This lays a neutral foundation for the conversation. For example, "I notice you have been overworking a lot lately."
Then describe how this perception affects your emotions. By sincerely sharing your feelings, you give the other person insight into your experience. This helps make the message personal, which can lead to greater understanding. For example, "When I see that you work so much, I worry that you are exhausted."
The next step is to name your underlying needs. Why do you feel the way you do? By sharing these needs, you give the other person more insight into what is important to you. This way, you avoid misunderstandings and can better keep the conversation open. For example, "I need a healthy work-life balance, and I would like you to have one too."
Now that you have explained what you need, it is time to make a concrete and achievable request. This is not a demand, but a question that gives the other person space to say yes or no. By making a request, you give the other person a chance to think about a solution. For example, "Would you consider discussing your working hours with the team to see how we can improve the balance?"
Finally, it is important to be open to what the other person has to say. Listen with empathy and try to empathise with their perspective. This creates a mutual connection and understanding and offers the opportunity to reach a solution together. Ask, for example, "How do you experience this situation?" This shows that you also understand the other person and want to work together to find a solution.
Why connecting communication is crucial for executives
Connecting communication can be a valuable tool for business owners and managers. It makes teams work better together, increases employee satisfaction and loyalty, and contributes to a positive work culture. In a world where quick and efficient decisions are often necessary, this approach can actually provide the necessary nuance and depth. Moreover, connecting communication contributes to lasting relationships with customers and business partners by focusing not only on the transactional, but also on the human aspect of cooperation.
Need help or want to know more about connecting communication?
I am happy to help you master connecting communication, whether you want to know more for personal development or for work. This approach allows you to better understand situations and find solutions that benefit everyone. Want to know more about how connecting communication can strengthen your leadership style? Feel free to get in touch via +32 474 072 444 for a free introductory talk or more information on executive coaching.
Frequently asked questions about connecting communicating
1. What is the difference between connecting communication and non-violent communication?
Non-violent communication is a form of connecting communication that focuses on avoiding judgement and using empathy to understand the other person.
2. Can I also apply connecting communication in my personal relationships?
Yes, connecting communication is suitable for both professional and personal relationships and helps to connect deeper and increase mutual understanding.
3. How long does it take to learn connecting communication?
Applying connecting communication is a process that requires practice. You can start right away, and the more often you use it, the easier it becomes.
4. Are training courses available for connecting communication?
Yes, various training courses and workshops are available. An experienced business coach can help you develop the skills.
Kurt Vervloet
Kurt Vervloet is a business coach, blogger and speaker. Since 2017, he has been coaching businesses around the world, ranging from solo entrepreneurs, SME companies to executive management teams at large organisations. His clients choose to work with him because of my proven, no-nonsense approach to optimising and scaling businesses. By achieving great results with his clients, he has already been rewarded with several Awards.
